GIRLS BIKE APRIL FOOLS DAY SPECIAL!
Today out of sheer boredom and lack of energy to actually perform pranks, I decided to enlighten my lovely circle of friends with my tried and true pranks. They range in difficulty setting and also tend to span across to career types. So, go ahead and read and use whenever needed.
Side note, I gave out these pearls of wisdom from the times of 0500am to 1200pm in Sydney Australia. And the rule is that April Fools expires at midday, which is ridiculous and stupid. It’s called “April Fools Day” not “April Fools Half Day”.
April fools simplicity guide number 1:
Photocopy the words “April Fools”. Place corresponding papers on the backs of cubical doors in public lavatories. Result would be unease and slight panic into what people sat on.
April fools simplicity guide number 2:
Choose a toilet at random and place cling wrap tightly across the porcelain.
April fools simplicity guide number 3:
Printscreen a work colleagues web browser and set it as their desktop, whilst also removing all icons on the desktop also.
April fools simplicity guide number 4:
Add food colouring to food items such as milk and juice, and remove yolks from eggs using 2 pinholes top and bottom. Leave in kitchen for the unsuspecting fool.
April fools simplicity guide number 5:
Super glue loose change on the floor in a high through-fare area, sit down, enjoy and maybe tally how many people get tricked.
April fools simplicity guide number 6:
Offer to take someone’s picture on your camera phone, set your camera to video function and record them waiting for the photo whilst making excuses about why the phone isn’t working.
April fools simplicity guide number 7:
Set your birthday to April the 1st, count how many generous birthday messages you get.
April fools simplicity guide number 8:
Coat all ceiling fans and Air Conditioner vents with flour or talcum powder.
April fools simplicity guide number 9:
Place Vaseline on door handles, window locks and taps.
April fools advanced guide number 10:
Purchase a great amount of sponges. Cut them into circular shapes that fit into cupcake cups/moulds . Then layer the top of the sponge with an intricate amount of creams and icing to give the sponge weight and presentation that is enticing. Find a cake box from a local baker with a sterling reputation, place all the cupcakes in and present it wherever necessary.
April fools simplicity guide number 11:
Apply a very fine layer of Vaseline to the glass plate of a photocopier. Also place a few pages in the photocopier’s paper tray that read “APRIL FOOLS”.
April fools intermediate guide number 12:
Buy a packet of creamed cookies, carefully scrape out all the cream innards from each cookie, replace with items that have the same colouring. For example: replace the innards of an Oreo with toothpaste.
April fools simplicity guide number 13:
At your workplace, place a post-it note across all the optical sensors underneath each mouse, turn up the volume to maximum on all speakers and replace desktop images with full screen images of broken LCD panels (make sure to hide all icons and the start bar or utility shelves on mac’s).
April fools advanced guide number 14: (Use at victims discretion)
Apply fish sauce or paste to the seals of the victims car doors. Leave sardines in the spare tire mount in the boot. Allow to ferment, so begin this prank at least 12 hours prior to victim using said car.
This can also be done with a household air-conditioner unit, leave rotting fish outside the external air-conditioner motor.
April Fools Profession prank 1: School Teacher.
Create a surprise test for your students. Make it multiple choice.
Have every answer as “C”.
April fools intermediate guide number 15:
Get a large zip-lock bag, fill it full of chocolate sauce. Close most but not all of the zip-lock bag.
Then place the bag full of chocolate sauce into your victims pillow.
Theoretically what should happen is when pressure from the victims head is applied to the pillow, it should rupture the bag open and leave a delicious mess.
April Fools Profession prank 2: TV Journalist.
Replace the word “Now” with “Meow”.
Deliver it still with a professional and set forth demeanour.
April fools simplicity guide number 16:
Open the bottom of a cereal box carefully, and close it whilst resting it on a table. Open up the bag of cereal and pour all its contents into the box. Proceed to carefully place the cereal box into wherever it is kept.
Theoretically what should happen is when the victim goes to retrieve the cereal, the box should then open up from the bottom and spill all its contents everywhere.
April Fools Profession prank 3: Chef.
Replace all Avocado’s and Guacamole pastes with Wasabi.
Simple.
April fools advanced guide number 17:
Buy a large 2litre bottle of Diet Coke, Diet Pepsi, Coke Zero or Pepsi Max and a packet of Mint Mentos. Get a needle and thread and proceed to insert the needle through a mentos mint. Once pu…shed through to the other side, make a tight knot.
Open up a bottle of the purchased soft drink and place the Mentos into the bottle cap, whilst holding onto the thread. Proceed to screw the cap back on, making sure to have the mentos NOT visible and the thread protruding outside of the bottle.
Then cut the thread on the outside of the bottle and place it into wherever it is kept (also try and cut the thread so that there are no visible outer marks).
Theoretically what should happen is when the victim reaches for the bottle of soft drink, they should then open the cap releasing the mentos straight into the drink, causing a chemical reaction and subsequent “Cola fountain”.
So there you have it. A long read showing you the sheer brilliance that is my trolling brain. It was a damn shame that I had no energy to do anything crazy in pranks today for April Fools, but if I managed to inspire someone to go ahead and do one of these pranks, then whatever pride shit fits here. Fuck you.
- Seb
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